Gym today

It felt really great at the gym today. I did 2 days of 5 factor fitness and 45 min of cardio. My feet started feeling too tingly at the end of the elypsys so I knew I had enough.

I’m still feeling like I’m addicted to food. Evidence of it is what happened at work today. Often when there’s food served at a meeting or a party, the leftovers are left at a desk in our office for everyone to take. It sits next to the printer. And I cannot pass that table without taking something again and again and again. Then I just had to get up and get some more and kept coming back till it was all gone. It was only fruit, but still. Its the fact that I wanted to keep eating it. Even if I could have stopped, I still had that compulsion to keep eating it. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Its the same when I went out with my sister. She had no appetite. Well, she has reasons for no appetite. But I always want more. If she has stuff left over in her bowl, then I want it. She will keep talking but all I am thinking about is how gracefully and subtly can I lick off all the rest of the food off the plates.

Ok that was my small segue into the state of my mind about food. I don’t know why that is and I don’t know if I will ever feel differently about it. I was hoping that I would with hypnosis. But I have hope that I can control my urges with practice. Every day, I’m trying to recognize the behaviours around food that simply don’t serve me and that perhaps are not very healthy.

I had a taco bell wrap today. I could have eaten something smaller. But I am still on track. I went to the gym. I had the food that I had, and then I stopped.